


Forgotten Memories

by AgxntReign



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Bisexual Female Character, Canon Lesbian Character, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Memory Loss, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-22
Updated: 2018-04-20
Packaged: 2019-04-06 09:29:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,220
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14053965
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AgxntReign/pseuds/AgxntReign
Summary: After getting injured badly while fighting Supergirl Sam loses her memory and doesnt remember Kara or Alex. What will happen to their friendships? Will Sam ever get her memories back?OrThe one where Sam loses her memories and she has to try and bring things back to normal. (While occasionally dealing with many obstacles along the way)





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> So this is my first slow burn fanfic and im sorry if its awful but yeah! I hope you enjoy!
> 
> This it not an actual Chapter, this is just something to lead into the first chapter

[3 Months ago]

Kara rushed inside of the DEO holding a limp Reign in her arms "Someone help! She's not breathing!" She shouted panicking getting her sisters attention

Alex ran to Kara seeing who she was holding "Come on follow me" she ran to the med bay and Kara set down the woman on one of the tables after Alex quickly moved everything off of it.

She looked at one of the Agents in the room and noticed it was Agent Vasquez "Vasquez start intubating" she turned to her sister and sighed "So please tell me why we are trying to save Reigns life?" She crossed her arms

Kara sighed and looked at Reign "Because thats not Reign anymore.... It's Sam..." she choked on her words then took a deep breath "Sam is Reign....I didn't know till it was too late. She got control again but by then it was too late she was on the ground bleeding out and-"

"Kara how do you know for sure that this is Sam?" Alex sighed

Kara looked down at Sam and spoke "Because when she was on the ground... the only thing she could think about was if daughter was okay... She kept asking me "Where's Ruby? Where's my Kid? Is she okay?"

Alex out her hands on her head "Oh no! Ruby!" She called out "Kara stay here with Sam I'm going to get Ruby and take her to Lena's place" Kara nodded and Alex ran out to her car and Drove to Rubys school.

When she arrived she rolled down the window to her car seeing Ruby "Rubes! She texted Lena while she waited for Ruby

Ruby got in the car and Smiled "Hey Alex...What's Wrong?"

"Something Came up at your mom's work she's going out of town for the day so you will have to stay with Lena" She said as they pulled up at Lenas Apartment

Ruby saw Lena waiting as they pulled into the parking lot "Oh Okay..." She was used to things like this because of what her mom does for a living. "Thank you for picking me up Alex' she sighed as she got out of the car and walked to Lena.

Alex nodded before she drove home and went to the DEO the next morning. She rushed inside to the DEO and Saw Sam and Kara talking in the Med bay She walked in and started typing on the computer when she over heard Sam speak to Kara " Im sorry but do I know you?"

"You don't Recognize me?" Kara said wide eyed and turned to Alex who was confused as well

Sam Shook her head "No im sorry.." She looked at Alex and looked confused a bit before she looked back at Kara "Look all i want is to go home and take care of my daughter is that too much to ask?"

"No. No of course not.. you can go.." She sighed

"Thank you" Sam said before Walking out quickly then running home

"She doesnt remember us..." Alex looked at Kara "What the hell is going on?" 

[15 minutes later]

Sam arrived at her house and smiled as she saw Ruby sitting on the couch texting her friends "Theres my little monster" Sam looked at Ruby

Ruby looked up from her phone screen and jumped off the couch running to her mom giving her a huge hug "Mom You're back!!" The young girl giggled

"Yep" she lifted Ruby up with ease and smiled at her "Im sorry the trip took longer than I expected"

Lena walked out of the bathroom "It's alright Ruby and I had a lot of fun!" She smiled "Well i should get home I'll see you later"

 


	2. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is the first official chapter of this story the last post was just an introduction. Im sorry if this is all over the place.

[2 months later]

Sam sat down at her desk writing in her notebook when her phone buzzed showing a reminder. She looked at her phone and the reminder said "Alex's Birthday in 4 days!"

She rubbed her forehead "Theres that name again" for the past 2 months she kept hearing the same 2 names over and over again. Kara and Alex Danvers. She couldn't figure out why but the names seemed so familiar but she never met anyone with the names Kara or Alex.

"What name?" Lena called out from the doorway

"Oh uh Alex Danvers.... wait you don't happen to know who that is do you?" Sam looked up at Lena

Lena was about to speak when a blonde woman with glasses walked in "Oh Lena i almost forgo-" she paused seeing Sam then she turned to Lena "I thought you said she wasn't gonna be here today... This is bad"

"Well she does run the place. And i did say no promises" Lena stated

Sam laughed lightly "okayyyyy what's going on? Who are you?" She looked at Kara confused

Kara glared at Lena and hoped that this wouldn't end badly then turned to Sam and held her hand out "Kara.. uh Kara Danvers"

Sam took her hand shaking it "did you just say your name is Kara Danvers...?"

"Yep" she smiled awkwardly then looked worried "Why?"

"Well its just for the past 2 months where ever i go i hear the names Kara and Alex Danvers. Although I hear the name Alex a lot more than Kara... It's like my mind is trying to get me to remember something important."

"Well... Alex.. is my sister Kara smiled lightly before her phone ran "Hello? Hey Alex... Uh yeah..no im not too far whats up? Oh...okay yeah I will be right there." She hung up and looked at Sam then Lena "well that was my sister and she needs me. So it was nice meeting you but i have to go. She rushed out and sighed "Oh boy" she said as she left

Sam waited till Kara left to speak "Well" she picked up her office phone and pressed a button seeing Lena's confused expression "Gina, is there anyway you can get me a meeting with Alex Danvers? I think it's about time we met" she put the phone down and Lena looked at her worried

Lena walked to her shaking her head "Sam i dont think thats a good idea" She said worried. Things had gone a bit downhill for Alex ever since Sam lost her memories all those weeks ago. Alex had only just gotten close to Sam a few weeks before the 'incident'. She had started to blame herself for Sam's Injury.

_Alex looked at the glass in her hand as Lena stood next to her in her apartment "Maybe if I wasn't so blinded by how I felt finally having a best friend. Maybe we could have found out sooner. And maybe just maybe we could have prevented this from happening"_

Lena still remembers the look on Alex's face when J'onn called Kara, Alex and herself to the DEO to explain Sams 'Condition'

_J'onn sighed while he crossed his arms "In order for Sam to be the Sam you guys know again, I had to go into her mind and remove all memories of anything that ties to Reign or the DEO from the past 10 months. She will remember Lena of course. Meaning she has no memories of Kara." He stated_

_"So don't mention Kara?" Lena asked and J'onn nodded "Got it"_

_He nodded again "Well Sam can remember who Kara is because it will not change her in anyway but" and looked at Alex "She will also have absolutely no memory of Alex" Alex looked down rubbing her forehead with her index finger and her thumb "For some reason any memories of you. The one person she loved the most other than her daughter or Lena. Triggered something in her brain causing her to...how do I say this? Uhm it caused her to change.. not into Reign but she wasn't the Sam woman she was before everything happened"_

_Alex's eyes widened and she looked up "Wait the one she loved the most?" She shook her head "Wouldn't that be Kara?"_

_"One would think that...but no it was you" J'onn stated "Kara you can't interact with Sam. Especially you Alex, You can not under any circumstances make contact with her. Things might go bad. We don't know for sure but we cant risk anything happening" J'onn said in a serious tone_

_Alex shook her head "I can't believe this is happening" she wiped a tear from her face_

_Lena walked to Alex putting a hand on her shoulder "Alex.. I know this is hard"_

_She shoved Lenas hand away "No you don't know!" She exclaimed "You didn't lose her Lena! She was the closest thing i have had to a best friend since high school!" She shook her head again and bit her lip "You can be near her... you can talk to her without anything going wrong. I can't do that" She said as her voice was shaky "I'm sorry i- i have to go" she walked out of the room quickly_

_"Alex..." Kara said quietly as the young woman walked out "Alex" she called out walking after her_

Sam looked at Lena confused "Why not?" She said sitting down at her desk

"Because... Alex she's not in a good place right now and i dont think that you questioning her about how you keep seeing or hearing her name everywhere you go" she shook her head "Plus what will be your excuse for getting her here?" Lena questioned

Sam shrugged "she sounded fine on the phone with Kara" she stated while typing on her laptop "Fine, ill email Gina to cancel the meeting"

"Thank you.." Lena said as she turned around and walked out the door and she shook her head and pulled out her phone  calling Kara "This is bad. She wants to meet Alex" she said to her friend over the phone "I convinced her to not call her over"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhh! Okay so this Agent Reign Fic is completely different from my other story called Bruises. I hope you guys enjoyed the first chapter so far! See ya next time I update


	3. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam has a strange feeling that things arent the way they are supposed to be

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay sooooo i hope you enjoy this chapter, Please comment your thoughts! It helps out a lot! Okay bye!!!!

[A few weeks later]

Sam stood up and stretched before she walked out to the car ready to take her home. She went home to see Ruby asleep and she paid the baby sitter before she went to bed.

_Sam opened her eyes quickly and looked around as she stood in someones loft "What the hell?" She whispered to herself. Hearing a familiar voice she quickly turned around and saw Lena sitting on the floor holding a glass of wine "Lena?" She looked around seeing Kara and 2 other women who she didn't really recognize then she saw herself "How the hell am I over there? And Kara?"_

_The raven haired woman laughed and looked at her glass of wine. "Yeah... Apparently he only sleeps with good Catholics" she looked up_

_Maggie laughed as she turned to face her fiancee and turned back to face Lena "That's Insane" she laughed_

_"Yeah, Actually I-I found it kind of attractive that he believed in something so" she sipped her wine "There's always that so" she shrugged_

_Sam walked to them as they continued "What the hell is going on?" She started to try and get Lena's attention "Lena!!" She shook her head as the young woman continued to speak "Lena!! Why can't you hear me?!?!" All the sudden she froze when Alex spoke_

_Alex looked at her drink then at 'Sam' and asked "So what about Ruby's dad? Is he still in the picture?"_

_She then spoke in unison with herself "Nope... just me and Ruby" she shook her head "I remember this now.. Why didn't I remember this before?" She stood up and the next thing she knew she was looking at Alex sitting across from her (Or another version of her)_

_Alex looked at her "I know this is scary but im not going to let you go through this alone"_

_"Alex?' She spoke quietly then woke up to the sound of Ruby calling out to her_

"Mom! Jamie is here to pick me up and take me to school!!" She ran outside the door and locked it behind her

Sam groaned as she stood up and got dressed. She got to work and walked to her office seeing two young women standing there waiting for her. One had long dark wavy brown hair and the other was slightly taller but had short redish brown hair. Sam cleared her throat "May i help you?" It looked like the brunette was about to leave

The two women turned around and Sam saw the red heads face causing her to freeze along with the red head. The silence in the room went away when the brunette spoke "Well this woman says your assistant called to set up an appointment with you and her.."

"Guess Gina never canceled the meeting" she sighed "Alex Danvers i presume?" she looked at the young woman and held her hand out

"Yeah" Alex took her hand and tensed up a bit

"Yeah and im just a worker here so im gonna go back to my desk" the brunette said before walking out

"Alright" Sam smiled then her head 'started to hurt' "Woah" she walked to the couch sitting down and closed her eyes for a second

Alex looked at Sam a bit confused and she shook her head "You okay miss?" She froze when Sam looked up at her

Wide eyed Sam stared at Alex "Alex?" Alex was now wide eyed also as she saw a familiar look on Sam's face

_Fear_

Alex sat down next to sam and rubbed her arm on instinct and whispered "Hey, hey you're okay Sam. I'm right here" She was starting to panic. She knew coming here was a bad idea. But she couldn't help it. She just had to see Sam.

Sam looked up at Alex with a smile "So i'm not crazy" she said brightly "You remember me. And i know that because only my friends call me Sam."

"You..wait what just happened?" Alex said confused

"I remember.... i remember everything... I remember Kara, Maggie, and most of all I remember you and how i felt" she shook her head "This is all so confusing"

"Wait you remember everything... _Everything?"_ Alex said worried "How do you feel? Do you feel any different?"

"Well i just found out that i lost all memories of two people I care deeply for so...I'm a little shaken up" Sam admitted "but other than that. I feel perfectly fine" She shrugged

Lex let out a sigh of relief and smiled "I missed you" she admitted. "And Ruby of course" she added

Sam nodded "Yeah about Ruby, how did she know not to mention you or Kara to me?"

"Yeah so Lena told her what happened and then she promised not to mention us under any circumstances because there was a possibility that you could have developed some form of P.T.S.D. From the lost memories"

"So obviously thats not the case. But what now? It's not like we can just go back to how things were before without J'onn finding out . And if he did find out he would try and erase my memories again." She sighed "And if Kara finds out she might tell J'onn and then we are back at square one. No memories" Sam groaned frustrated

"Yeah i know.. i know but Sam i can't just go back to the way things have been the past 4 months" she shook her head "I've been a mess without you Sam." She sighed "I can't go another 3 months or however long this is going to have to last without my best friend"

Sam rubbed her forehead a bit "Alex, what else are we going to do? She sighed " they have to believe that i still don't have my memories." She sighed again "We can text and call but we can't be seen together..."

"That's true" Alex admitted then shook her head "I guess this is it then. See you around Sam" she stood up and walked to the door

Sam stood up quickly walking after Alex "Alex wait" the red head turned to Sam. She pulled Alex into a hug and she whispered against Alex's shoulder "For what it's worth... In the few weeks i have had my memories back... i've missed you like crazy"

Alex pulled away from the hug smiling "At least this time we got to say goodbye" she laughed looking at her hands before hugging Sam again quickly "Bye Sam"

Sam smiled lightly "Bye Alex" She said quietly

Alex smiled before she turned around to the door again and walked out

Sam let out a heavy breath and closed her eyes a bit "I miss you already" she laughed shaking her head as she walked back to her desk and started working on some paper work


	4. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam and Alex have a movie night

Sam sighed as she walked around while on the phone “Yes, Yes I understand what you are suggesting.” She sipped her water “But what you don’t understand is that if we do this we would be putting many L-Corp employees out of work.” She was cut off by the man speaking “N-no! I am not doing that. In case you have forgotten I’m the CFO not the CEO, that is Ms. Luthors job. And I will not be making any decisions like this without her knowledge.” She rolled her eyes as the man argued “No, my decision is final. Goodbye.” She sighed as she rested her hands on the counter

“You’re real cute when you’re being all professional” Lena Smiled as she walked into the office and Sam turned to her “Lena, Hey” she smiled slightly “what are you doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be at CatCo with James?” 

“Oh well I’m going to lunch with Kara, Her boyfriend Mike, and Winn” Lena started 

Figuring that she wouldn’t remember Winn if she didn’t have her memories she asked “What’s a Winn?” Lena opened her mouth then let out a laugh “Well-“ 

**_Meanwhile in the main lobby of L-Corp_ **

Alex walked inside as she couldn’t help but want to see Sam then she saw Kara turn to her wide-eyed as she walked to her sister “Oh god, here we go” 

As soon as she reached her sister she took a deep breath and spoke “What are you doing here? Are you crazy?” earning a sigh from her younger sister along with an eye roll “Don’t roll your eyes at me Alex! This is serious, don’t you remember what J’onn said could happen if Sam sees you?”

Fighting her urge to roll her eyes she looked at her hands then at Kara “It doesn’t make sense on how you can be around her and be her friend when you got the same warning that I did! I mean seriously Kara? It’s- it’s ridiculous, and unfair.” 

Kara sighed “Alex, I know you miss her. But we can’t risk anything happening to her. I’m already taking a huge risk interacting with her.” She said as she saw her sisters eyes widen as she looked behind her seeing Lena and Sam on the other side of the Lobby. “Shit- Hang on” She picked up her sister and sped her to her apartment building before rushing outside of L-Corp and leaning against the wall like she had been waiting 

Sam looked at her phone as it rang “Hang on ive gotta take this, ill catch up” she said to Lena as she went to answer the call “Hello?” She smiled when she heard the other womans voice through the phone 

“Hey!” Alex said brightly 

“Alex, Hey! What’s Up?” Sam smiled brightly

Alex laughed lightly “Nothing much I just… wanted to call to- say hey, because we haven’t talked since the other day over the phone” 

“You’re too sweet” Sam smiled them saw Kara and Lena waiting outside “Look I’m really sorry but I have to go. Lunch with Lena and-“

Alex sighed “Kara, yeah I know she told me, and its fine ill let you go… see ya” she hung up 

Sam pulled the phone from her ear and sighed “See ya” She shook her head before going to join her friends outside “Sorry that was Ruby” 

**_Around 8 hours later_ **

Sam pulled out her phone and Called Alex and waited till she picked up “Hey, are you busy?” Alex looked around as she walked the streets of national city before she replied “Not really, why? Whats up?” Sam sighed and put her hand on her forehead “I just needed someone to talk too” 

“Oh, Well then talk away” Alex replied and looked around as things got quiet “Come on Sam. Whats on your mind?” 

Sam sighed as she shook her head lightly “I don’t know…everything?” she said while she sat in her office 

Alex furrowed her eyebrows “What do you mean everything?” 

Sam clicked her tongue trying to think of a way to explain things “What I mean is, I cant stop thinking about everything I did. Everyone I hurt, I cant help but think that maybe you guy should have just let me die”

The call was silent as Alex stood in the middle of the street shocked by Sams words “No…. Sam don’t say that. It wasn’t you and you know that. We all know that, and” She sighed and shook her head “How long have you been feeling this way?” 

“Since I got my memories back…” Sam sighed and noticed how silent Alex had gotten “Alex?” 

Alex spoke suddenly as she was now getting her keys out of her pocket as she was getting near her apartment building. There was only one thing she could think of that could help Sam. “Meet me at my apartment in 30 minutes okay? Oh and bring your PJ’s and a clean set of clothes”

“What? Wait why?” Sam said as she stood up to get ready to leave. It’s not like she really needed a reason. She would do anything to go see Alex right now.

“You will see when you get here.” Alex stated simply “Ill see you in a bit” she said as she hung up the call and rushed inside of her apartment building running up the stairs to her floor since the elevator in her building no longer works. She quickly opened the door to her apartment then went straight to her kitchen grabbing an un cooked bag of popcorn and put it in the microwave. 

“But-“ Sam said before she heard the beep indicating that the call ended “Well that conversation is over.” She sighed then walked out of her office “Jess clear my schedule for the rest of the evening I have personal matters to tend too” she said as she headed home to change and grab some clothes. 

Ruby had been at a friend’s house so she was fine with going to Alex’s Apartment. She headed to the address that Alex sent her and hesitantly knocked on the door.  She heard feet patting on the floor from inside the apartment after there was a loud thud followed by Alex mumbling a curse word. 

Alex heard a knock at the door and she jumped a bit causing her to drop her phone “Shit” she mumbled under her breath and sat up from the couch putting the bowl of popcorn down on the coffee table. She walked to the door and opened it “Hey come in” she moved over giving Sam room to walk in 

Sam smiled lightly as she saw Alex in her pajamas and walked inside. “So what is this?” 

“You my friend are in dire need of a Harry Potter Movie Marathon with your best friend.” she smiled as she pulled her friend to the couch and sat down putting her arm on the back of the couch waiting for Sam as her excitement shinned through her smiling like a dork  

“You are such a dork” Sam laughed as she sat down next to Alex

Alex pulled her close and picked up a bowl of popcorn before sitting back noticing Sam looking up at her “Sorry” she laughed as she moved over giving Sam space “It’s a habit I guess” She laughed 

“Oh no im fine with It” Sam laughed “You just caught me off guard” She laughed as she cuddled up to her best friend for the rest of the movie and spoke when Alex was making more popcorn and setting up the next movie “Thanks for this… I really needed it” She smiled 

“Yeah, I kinda needed it too I guess” Alex admitted as she sat down next to her friend and Scooted close to her once again 

“Yeah? Why is that?” Sam asked as she now was a little intrigued

“Maggie Texted me today” she admitted as she ate a piece of popcorn 

“Oh…” Sam said quietly “Do you mind me asking why?” she looked up at the redhead as she rested her head on her shoulder 

“She wants to talk… She is back in national city and she thinks we should try again” she shrugged 

“Is that not a good thing?” Sam asked a bit more confused now 

“I mean it’s been almost a year since we broke it off. I don’t know if it should be a good thing or not” she sighed as she ate more popcorn while looking at the TV

“Oh… I guess you are right” Sam took some popcorn then held it in her hand “Hey Alex… you never told me why you and Maggie broke up in the first place… if you don’t mind me asking… why is that?” 

Alex looked down at Sam before nodding slowly “Yeah uhm… She didn’t want kids and I did… she thought my need to be a mom as some ridiculous notion… so it didn’t work out” she said quietly 

Sam sat up a bit “Im sorry about that…” 

Alex shifted a bit as she paused the movie “don’t feel bad Sam it’s not your fault” 

“I know its not but If I knew… gah I don’t know I just feel bad that I wasn’t there enough for you. During that im sorry”

“Its fine Sam. You’re here now.” She said honestly “Plus im over it now. I may have taken me a while but im over it… over her.” She smiled and turned her attention back to the movie

Sam smiled back at her friend.  _ Did her eyes always shine like that?  _ She asked herself as she saw the shimmer in Alex’s Brown eyes and shook her head a bit  _ Stop thinking about her like that.  _ She thought, she can’t help but see how her feelings for Alex have developed into something more than friendship.  She really cared for her, more than a friend should. She paid more and more attention to the little things that Alex does; the way she bites her lip when she’s nervous or excited (She could never tell which one It was), the way looks down at her feet and tucks her hair behind her ear when she says something embarrassing, or the way her face lights up the moment she lays eyes on Ruby. 

She keeps trying to tell herself it’s just not going to happen. It’s way too soon for Alex, she’s still hurting from her previous break up. Or  _ If you tell her it would just make things complicated, it would ruin the friendship.  _ And she didn’t want to lose Alex, it was too much for her to bare. Yeah sure she had lost her before but that was different. She didn’t remember her so she didn’t have anything to be upset about. So she has been keeping her mouth shut. Hiding her feelings so no one gets hurt especially Alex.

The room was silent; only the sounds were the people talking in the movie. After a few minutes Sam stood still, still looking at the TV “Hey…Alex?” Alex sat up and looked down at her friend “Hey uh Sam?” she said quietly with a laugh while she combed through the brunette’s hair

“I uhm” Sam looked up not realizing how close they were. When she turned around her nose brushed against Alex’s. She heard Alex’s Breath hitch when they got close. Her eyes searched Alex’s before she leaned in and pressed her lips against hers

Alex let out a surprised moan into the kiss but she pulled away. One part of her was telling her to hold on and give in but another was saying it was too soon that she can’t do this. So she gave in and pulled away. “Sam….” 

“I’m sorry… I shouldn’t have…” she shook her head sitting up and going away from Alex

“It’s okay” Alex shook her head 

“No… I knew it was too soon” she continued to shake her head “I knew it was too soon and I still” she sighed “I’m Sorry” 

“Its okay Sam Really. But I don’t… want that right now…” she sighed “I’m sorry”

Sam nodded and she moved to the other side of the couch “I’ll just sit here...” 

“Sam…” Alex said feeling horrible for what she just did “You don’t have to-“ 

“It’s okay Alex… Let’s just watch the movie okay?” she said quietly and Alex nodded before looking back at the TV 

About 30 minutes into the movie Alex had fallen asleep so Sam took this as an opportunity to get out there as soon as she could and quickly grabbed her things before quietly walking out and heading home. When she got home she went straight to her room and curled up into a ball and put her head on her knees “I’m such an idiot” she sobbed to herself. She messed up, she knows her actions ruined everything. She didn’t even know why she kissed her, maybe it was the way Alex’s gaze drifted down to her lips quickly or the way she was so close to her. Either way she messed up bigtime. 

And there’s no going back. 

Alex woke up the next day to see Sam was gone. She sighed and mentally face palmed as she remembered how she straight up rejected Sam last night. She knows how it feels to be rejected like that, saying that when she first told Maggie how she felt and kissed her, she rejected her. She didn’t want to lose Sam so she grabbed her phone and texted her 

_ Alex: Hey, I just wanted to check in and see if you were ok. I noticed you left when I was asleep.  _

_ ✓✓ _ _  Read at 10:36 AM  _

She sighed as she saw Sam read the message but not respond. She stood up and got dressed and got ready for work then texted her again 

_ Alex: Well have a good day at work I guess.  _

_ ✓✓ _ _  Read at 10:42 AM  _

She turned off her phones ringer as soon as she got to work and spent the day training with Kara occasionally messaging Sam to make sure she was ok, not really realizing how clingy she seemed. 

Sam sighed as she sat in her office at L-Corp filling out a bunch of paperwork. She had been working on the same piece of paper for 20 minutes because of the constant messages from Alex. She groaned after she got another message and finally picked up her phone and sent a reply 

_ Sam: I’m fine Alex. I just need some time alone… I’m sorry I just can’t be around you right now _

_ ✓✓ _ _  Read at 12:42 PM  _

She didn’t want to stay away from her but she thought it was for the best. She couldn’t stand the awkward conversations or the awkward exchange of looks they would have after last night’s events.

_ She ruined everything _


	5. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex talks to Kara while Sam... Well she had a different way of coping

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok ok so pleaseeee dont be mad at me!!! I worked really hard on this chapter and i know its not what a lot of yall want but this is called a slowburn Fanfic for a reason ;) ok i hope you... somewhat enjoy this chapter

_I just can’t be around you right now._

Sam’s message ran through Alex’s mind as though it was on a continuous loop. No matter where she was or what she was doing she would always end up thinking about it. Reading that message was like a blow to the heart, she never wanted to hurt Sam that way, she wouldn’t wish that upon anybody. She knows how it feels to be rejected like that. And damn it hurts a lot. It’s been almost 4 weeks since they last talked- Well more like 25 days but that’s still a long time. She had been helping out by picking Ruby up from school or soccer practice but she never ran into Sam and had a few conversations but she thought it was for the best but it destroyed her.

The truth is, Alex wanted to kiss Sam. She really really wanted to kiss her, she wanted to hold her close and cuddle on the couch while watching Harry Potter with her and Ruby. But she was afraid, afraid that if she did- if she was open to Sam about how she feels and she turns her down that it would ruin their friendship. Or that if Sam did feel the same way-- they got together and things didn’t work out that, that would definitely ruin the friendship. She didn’t want to lose what she had with Sam. She told Kara that she was back in contact with Sam and that she had been for a while now, because she needed someone to talk too and the only person she trusted enough to do so with was Kara. So she told her, Kara didn’t agree with the risk of Sam having her memories back but she had to deal with their decisions.

So as Alex was sitting on the couch in her now seemingly empty apartment with a glass small glass of whiskey in her hand tears threatening to roll down her face she pulled out her phone and dialed Kara’s number. She didn’t even have to say anything saying that as soon as Kara picked up the phone she spoke “Don’t worry, I’ll be right there” Kara had always seemed to know when Alex needed her to be there. And Alex knew it had nothing to do with her super hearing. It was just the way Kara was, and she was grateful for it, although she doesn’t show it at times.

Seconds later Alex turned around to see her sister flying in through the balcony. She whispered out a Hey before turning back around and taking another sip of her drink. Kara quickly walked to the couch and grabbed the drink from her sister’s hand “Drinking isn’t the solution Alex…” she said quietly as she set the drink down on the coffee table

“It helps me…clear my mind” Alex sighed and shook her head “I know I shouldn’t be drinking Kara... it’s just- I messed up big time. And im not sure I can fix it”

“When you say you messed up… You mean with Sam?” Kara said quietly as she tilted her head down a bit to look at Alex. Her sister’s eye’s shot up to look at her wide as she was stuttering. Guessing what her sister was about to say or was trying to say she quickly spoke “Sam and I are friends Alex, we talk.” She smiled sadly “So what happened? I thought you- well I mean you told me that… I thought you liked her?”

“I know what I told you Kara” Alex snapped lightly then sighed “And I still do, I just- in the moment I didn’t know what to do and I freaked out. If I could take that back” she paused “I would, but I cant. And it kills me that I hurt her, really it does because I know how she feels. I know what she is feeling and it kills me that I’m the one that caused her to feel that way” she slurred a bit while speaking.

Kara looked at Alex nodding understanding how she felt. “Then go talk to her” She said while rubbing her sisters back lightly

Alex shook her head “I can’t Kara, she said she needs space and ive been trying to give that to her”

Kara raised an eyebrow and shook her head a bit “Alex you have been spending almost all of your free time with Ruby”

“Yeah, Ruby not Sam, Kara I don’t want to ruin things more than I already have with Sam” Alex sighed then froze when her phone rang showing Sams name on the screen and she looked at Kara

Kara’s eyes went wide then she stood up “I should get back… I have an early day tomorrow” she laughed nervously

“Karaaaaa” Alex started

“Look at the time! Gotta blast!” she flew out the window

Alex sighed then picked up her phone answering “Yeelllloooo” she said Drunkenly not looking at the phone screen as she sat down

“Alex hey” Sams voice rang through the phone while she had a small smile on her face. Just as soft as it was every time she called while Ruby was asleep

“S-Sam hey whatz up? Hang on let me pause the TV” she slurred slightly thinking Sam wouldn’t notice while pausing the TV

“I needed to ask you for a fav- wait a minute” Sam froze then sighed “Are you drinking?”

Alex quickly looked up and at the camera “What? N-no” she said defensively then saw the look on Sam’s face and sighed “How did you know?”

“First off you’re slurring your words. Also you actually answered my call this time” Sam stated and Alex’s mouth dropped into the shape of an O. “Anyway I was gonna ask if you can pick Ruby up from school tomorrow, she has a half day and I wont be home till late”

Alex yawned “Yeah- yeah sure. What time?” Sam told Alex what time to pick ruby up and gave her a list of chores for the kid to do while Alex wrote everything down (Sloppily). “Okay I got it..” Alex said as she finished writing “Ill pick her up tomorrow… see you around” she said as she was about to hang up

“Alex wait!” Sam sighed relieved when Alex didn’t hang up “Look I’m sorry…”

“About?” Alex looked honestly confused

“For avoiding you… I guess I just thought things would be awkward.” Sam sighed and Alex could have sworn that she heard someone whisper a ‘It’s ok babe.’ In the background

“Oh” Alex paused “Yeah that.. Don’t worry about it Sam. You just needed space I totally understand”

“Yeah. Plus, I shouldn’t have done what I did.” She laughed “I was a little out of it” she lied “you know one too many glasses of wine. And I was worried that things would get weird”

Alex’s heart sunk at those words. Of course it was the Alcohol, how stupid could she have been to think Sam might actually have feelings for her. It was stupid, she was stupid. “Yeah” she tried to smile but it failed“Look its getting late I should go.”

Sam nodded slightly before she smiled “Night, Alex” She waited for the other woman to say goodnight before hanging up the video call and she sat on the edge of the bed and felt two arms wrap around her shoulders lightly as they hugged her from behind and she leaned into the other woman’s embrace.

“See? That wasn’t that hard now was it?” The raven haired woman kissed Sam’s cheek

“I guess not” Sam smiled as she turned to face her ‘friend’ and she saw Lena Luthor smiling from ear to ear

“I’m proud of you babe. I know that had to be hard” she pressed a kiss on her lips “Now come on its late and I want cuddlesss” She said goofily

Sam shook her head lightly before she laid down and pulled Lena close and she turned off the light “Night, Lena” They fell asleep quietly cuddled up next to each other.

Then Sam woke up with the smaller woman in her arms with her head resting on her shoulder groaning as the alarm went off Sam laughed as she turned off the alarm “Sorry Sorry”

Lena groaned again as she put her head in the crook of Sam’s neck “Morning” she mumbled

Sam rubbed Lenas arm “Morning” she kissed the top of Lenas head and sat up lightly causing Lena to move her head to the pillow

“Noooo” she sighed

“Come on, you have to go to work early” Sam smiled as she rubbed her eyes and walked to Rubys room and turned on the light “Hey baby its time to wake up” She kept the light on then walked to the kitchen to see Lena already drinking coffee and she handed her a cup “Thanks babe” Sam smiled while taking the cup and taking a sip

Lena smiled “I have to shower” she smiled before kissing Sam’s cheek and walking upstairs

Ruby walked down stairs 5 minutes later and frowned a bit when she saw Lena “Hey mom, Alex is taking me to school” she said not acknowledging Lena.

“Ok baby, aren’t you going to say good morning to Lena?” she questioned

Ruby shook her head “I’m good” she shrugged then walked to get a water “It’s not like I have to pretend to like the fact that she’s here”

Sam sighed now a bit angry “Why can’t you accept the fact that Lena and I are together?!”

“Because Mom! No matter how hard you try. No matter how hard she tries” Ruby turned to her “She will never match up to what you and Alex have!” she saw Sam start to speak and she sighed “And I know that deep down you know this thing” she pointed at a photo of her and Lena “Isn’t what you really want. Plus we all know that deep down Lena has a huge crush on Kara” she sighed and walked upstairs “Im going to put my shoes on”

The doorbell rang and Sam sighed then put on her best fake smile and went to open the door “Hey, Rubes is just putting her shoes on” she said moving over letting Alex inside.

Alex smiled then walked inside closing the door “Oh okay”

Lena walked down the stairs wearing Sam’s top “Sam is it okay if I wear this-“ she froze seeing Alex “Hey.. I didn’t know you were here..”

Alex stood there awkwardly “ I could say the same for you…” she said now slightly confused “I thought you were getting breakfast with Kara today..”

Lena smiled lightly “Oh I am” she laughed “I was just on my way out actually. I just came by for the shower. My apartment doesn’t have warm water…” she lied then grabbed her bag “Ill see you around Sam” she said then looked at Alex “You too- Agent Danvers” she walked out

Alex looked at Sam then smiled when she was suddenly rammed into by a little girl “Hey Rubes!” she laughed as she hugged her “Ready to go?”

Ruby smiled and nodded “Hell yeah!”

“You get approximately one hell yeah and you just used it up you got that?” Alex said in a playful tone and Ruby laughed. “Alright lets go” she turned to Sam smiling slightly before whispering a “Bye Sam” as she walked out the door closing it behind her

Sam stood there dumb founded still by what Ruby said to her earlier as she waved goodbye “Yeah… Bye Alex..”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok ok wo i know some of you will be mad at me...so you know what? Fuck it! Go off in the comments lmao writing this kind of drama is what i live for so we all know i wont stop lololol any way i hope you somewhat enjoyed my crappy writing and ill see you next time i update! Byeeeee


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